Are You an Emotional Hoarder?

We are sisters
Holding on to painful memories
Refusing to move ahead
Tied to what’s over
Looking for ways to let go
We are sisters

So ARE you an emotional hoarder?

Most of us would likely answer that with a resounding NO!

But let’s dig a little deeper….

Do you revisit painful experiences over and over?

Do you contemplate better ways to handle a traumatic experience years after?

Do you throw past slights or abusive behaviors back at your MIAC during arguments?

“Emotional hoarding fills your brain with negativity and allows no room for anything positive.”

— Sisters in the Storm

If you’re nodding along, maybe you’re holding onto painful emotions long after the event is done. Why do we continue to torture ourselves with hurtful memories? When we can’t fix our ill child, we immediately feel like a failure and that leads to self-punishment.

Does this sound familiar?

It’s three in the morning and you’re wide awake with flashbacks of your MIAC’s first psychotic break spinning through your brain like some distorted carnival act. The screams, accusations of being a terrible mother, police car lights, ambulance sirens, and threats against you are as vivid tonight as they were years ago. You feel sick to your stomach, dizzy, and are praying the ground will swallow you whole. If you had just done better maybe this wouldn’t have happened.

When we hold tight to painful emotional memories, it creates a buildup of stress, toxic feelings, and loss. This can cause physical, mental, and emotional problems in every area of your life. Emotional hoarding is destructive to both you and your child.

It’s necessary to have ways to cope with old emotional chatter. Brain clutter takes up space for new positive experiences and distorts your perspective. It’s time to work on clearing your mind of useless drama and heartache.

How do you learn to release these unwanted thoughts and feelings?

Acknowledge that the event is over and nothing can be changed about it.

Be willing to let go and learn a new way of processing trauma.

Write it down and burn it.

Visualize throwing it up into outer space where it will transmute into love.

Make a conscious effort when emotional memories arise to replace them with positive ones.

Get up and do something to take your mind off past events.

 Just for today:

I will redirect my mind to positive memories.

I will be gentle with myself.

I will remind myself my child’s illness is not my fault.

I will focus on my own health and wellbeing.